Sunday, August 9, 2015

Return of the Cynic

Oh, earthlings.
Summer was not what I thought it would be.

Summer was supposed to be much, much more devoted to this blog. I wanted to finish Shatter Me before September, so so badly, wanted to make some sort of headway with Night Circus. I wanted to write about everything and nothing, wanted to nitpick things I love and curse like a goddamn sailor (not that that hasn't been happening).

But things took a bit of a turn and things are finally settling down. Long story and a few panic attacks and some tears short, I am bisexual. So yeah, that took a surprising amount of priority in my life. But I'm back, bitches.

Next chapters of both will hopefully hopefully hopefully be up within a week, now that my life has calmed the fuck down. Writings might be more sparse (because Soul Eater (holy shit, Soul Eater) has taken over the drawing and writing facets of my Old Faithful-esque creativity).

So so sorry for the silence, but I just feel better these days, and that's certainly worth a little hiatus. 

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Update

Hello hello!
It may seem like I'm not sticking to my own timeline (and I'm not), but it's not out of disregard.

The story for this week ended up requiring more fleshing out, so it'll be quite a bit longer than the others. May have to postpone reviews for the first half of this week to finish.

Don't fret.
They say patience is a virtue.

Thursday, June 25, 2015

The Night Circus- Part Two (Illumination): Chapter Thirty-One(Movement) - Boooooooooring

This chapter begins with Herr Thiessen pioneering fangirling over the circus. 

This time, the circus arrives near his hometown of Munich, much to his delight, and he finally gets to meet with Celia, the two having exchanged many letters over the years.


He is surprised to find she is the illusionist, and is embarrassed to a strange degree, considering they had never met.


"'Most people don't recognize me outside of the circus,' Cilia says as he takes her hand.

'Then most people are fools,' he says, lifting her hand to his lips and lightly kissing the back of her glove. 'Though I feel a fool myself for not knowing who you were all this time.'"

They enter the workshop, there are some vague sentences about how Celia is apparently a savant at languages, and apparently taught herself German. Alright then.

Thiessen asks why she did not previously request that they meet, to which she responds that she wished to remain anonymous so he wouldn't view her differently, which I relate to quite a bit. 
This whole prelude to the point is seeming rather frivolous, to be honest. There's nothing wrong with frilly writing, but when you can gloss over four pages with a summary of a few sentences, there's a problem.

They talk about reveurs, the original fangirls if there ever were ones, before moving on to the clocks.

Celia sees a clock that resembles the bonfire, one Thiessen says needs fixing, before she touches it and it begins working. This makes very little sense, considering the fact that the clock follows astronomical movement and that Thiessen said it would need to be dismantled...

BUT OH WELL BECAUSE MAGIC WOW

Anyyyyyway, Thiessen says nothing, as he always does about magic, and they go out to dinner.

He explains why he never asks about the magic (in a quote Kindle highlighted 2291 times), they go to the circus and he watches her perform.

This chapter was just tiring really. Fluff about Thiessen and Celia becoming friends. The only real plot is introduced at the end (even though it began chapter), as this chapter ends with the news of Tara's death.

*Cue Beethoven's 5th symphony

Hope the plot picks up soon; I don't want to slog through four more chapters of this abstract elegance.


Count on a short story up before Sunday.






Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Schedules

So things are settling down in life for now.

And it's time to stop screwing around.
I plan to post reviews at least twice a week; a minimum of one per book.
In addition, I'll try to have a weekly short story/drabble about whatever circles the gutter containing my mind.
Not to mention, if any one of you apparently mute earthlings decided "Hey, I want Audrey to write about this topic" and actually commented about it, I'd do it immediately. Not kidding.

Also, if I manage to procure any, there might be a few guest authors popping up here and there to bitch about books I haven't read (or steal reviews of books I have from under my nose).

Either way, it'd be a refreshing change.

Toodles for now!
I'll attempt to have the next chapter of The Night Circus up by Friday.

Monday, June 22, 2015

Shatter Me- Chapter Twenty - The Metaphor Game is too Strong

This chapter, while tedious and angsty (like every other encounter with Warner in this book), contains some metaphors that just...I don't have words for.

"a dress the color of dead forests and tin cans"

"My body is a carnivorous flower, a poisonous houseplant [why would anyone keep one?], a loaded gun with a million triggers [cause that's how guns work, right?] and he's more than ready to fire [oddly true innuendo]."

"2 velvet chairs punched out of a constellation"

My personal favorite: "He's wrong he's so wrong he's more wrong than an upside-down rainbow."
HIGHLIGHTED 714 TIMES REEEEALLY?

This isn't a metaphor but still worth mention: "I don't know what food really is anymore."

Truly a display of the power of misunderstanding of objects, colors, and the human mind.

But moving on; I don't much feel like going over this chapter, so:

Juliette: "You sick goddamn bastard, you don't own me [fantastic song, by the way, wonderful 60s feminism], I still don't know how to life."

Warner: "Damn you fine, will you pretty pretty please kill people for me, I swear you'll like it, I mean just look at me, we're quite similar, you'll see it my way soon."

So yeah. This isn't the first of these, and unfortunately, it won't be the last. They just get kinkier from here.


Next chapter of the Night Circus, GOD WILLING, will be up by Friday.

Friday, June 19, 2015

The Night Circus- Part Two (Illumination): Chapter Thirty (Temporary Places) - And the Murders Begin!

All riiiiight, earthlings!

It's about time I got my ass in gear and got back to reviews, now I've got the time.
So here we go.


This chapter begins with Tara continuing her bout of uncertainty, constantly thinking about the card Mr. Barris gave her (which isn't even private, it's a hotel). Her sister's still traveling around Italy while Tara stews in their townhouse, rejecting invitations to anything social.


Eventually, she decides to visit the hotel, finding herself above a train station whose name I had to look at a few times before realizing it was not in fact called St. Pancreas Station (it was Pancras).
It's late.

As usual, the public is kept out of circus affairs, as the front desk doesn't know of any Mr. A H-, and it's a little while before the colorless devil himself appears in the lobby.

She explains her jitters while he looks on with "very mild interest", something I can only imagine would be incredibly annoying.

And then he proceeds to give a bullshit answer.

"'The circus is simply a circus,' he says. ;Am impressive exhibition, but no more than that. Don't you agree?'"

And then everything gets iffy. I'm assuming that here he uses magic to make her forget her concerns and agree, telling her that she has a train to catch (which she doesn't, not really).

She sees him arguing with Hector, who's, of course, transparent. Realizing here I never really made a transparency joke.
You'd think Celia'd be able to see through his lies, now he's see-through.
Ah, well. I tried.

Anyway.

This chapters ends as, completely absorbed in whatever she's just seen, Tara steps forward.
Into the path of a train.

And the death toll begins.
This was the first indirect death at the hands of Mr. A H-, and unfortunately, it won't be the last.

But we'll get to that in due time.

I can't say exactly when I'll be posting again, but it will be soon. I hope to fall into some semblance of order in about a week or so.

Friday, June 5, 2015

Something New

So despite my love, all-encompassing and desperate, for literature...reviews are not the most invigorating thing.

I've caught myself more than a few times treating it like a duty, and it's never good to get into that mentality. 
So I figured that if I have a little free time and don't feel like conjuring up my inner cynic for a short rant about YA or useless chapters or whatever, I'd do something else.

So I'll try to post some writing (gasp).
It might be shitty.
It'll probably be shitty.

But I feel awful to disappoint however many of you earthlings actually refresh the blog page once in a while only to have your heart sink minimally when my current lethargic streak continues.
By the way, I have absolutely no idea how many that is. We get like zero feedback. All I know is our pageview (daily, weekly, monthly, etc.) count.
If one of you said something, anything, I think I'd go into conniptions (in a good way).
It sounds desperate to ask for, but seriously. I'm flying blind here. I have no idea if anyone likes/hates my content. Please please please say something, one of you.


Anyway. I'll be writing random babble, bits of things rattling around inside my head, just to keep busy around here.

Next chapter of The Night Circus will hopefully hopefully hopefully be up before my creativity withers. Same goes for writings.

Thursday, June 4, 2015

Shatter Me- Chapter Nineteen- FIIIIINNALLYYY

So....
It's been a month.
A month exactly, actually.

I guess you could say I took a hiatus.
But now I am back.

And things will be different in the summer.


Aaanyway.

Finally. After eighteen chapters of stupid, things get less stupid.

This chapter begins with nightmares. 
Juliette wakes up and starts scrambling around for the paper, the proof that Adam is, in fact, super horny.

And then she runs into Adam.
Who's sleeping on the floor.
Next to her.
Without her knowing.
Shirtless.

Need more proof he's super horny?

He tells her to lie down...on the floor, next to him, and drapes a blanket over her while she watches him. Metaphor-izing about how him being shirtless makes her unable to breathe or whatever.

When she wakes up, she goes into the bathroom, where she finds him all bruised and feels rather guilty. 

They proceed to have a very stuttered and short conversation, in which no definite thing is actually said.

"'Juliette.' His voice hugs the letters in my name so softly I die 5 times in that second. His face is a forest of emotion. He shakes his head. 'I'm sorry,' he says, so quietly I'm certain I imagined it. 'It's not...' He clenches his jaw and runs a nervous hand through his hair. 'All of this- it's not-"
I open my palm to him. The paper is a crumpled wad of possibility. 'I know.'"

...
Well, thanks for clearing that up.

Somehow, though, they miraculously understand each other and Adam is all relieved she found the paper.

She's about to say something and he motions for her to stop. While Warner isn't pervy enough to watch her in the bathroom (at least not yet, anway), there might be microphones.

So he turns on the shower. To muffle the sound. Makes sense, right? They can't be heard now.


...and then he pulls her into it. 
Clothed, and so is he.
Cause logic.

And here I get all drifty and "awwww" but I'll do my best.
She's all spacey and metaphor-ing more than she ever has cause HOLY SHIT HE CAN TOUCH ME.
It's a valid reaction.

The metaphors really are fantastic, though. Here are a couple, as well as some of Juliette just being CRAZY horny.

"I want to cry out for all the wrong reasons. His eyes pin me in place. His urgency ignites my bones."

"My skin is scorched everywhere he's not touching me. His lips are so close to my ear I'm water and nothing and everything and melting into a wanting so desperate it burns as I swallow it down."

"'I can touch you,' he says, and I wonder why there are hummingbirds in my heart."

"His body presses closer and I realize I'm paying attention to nothing but the dandelions blowing wishes in my lungs."

"His fingers are 10 points of electricity killing me with something I've never known before. Something I've always wanted to feel."

"He almost cracks a smile and I almost sprout a pair of wings."

"But his hands become arms around my waist his lips become a cheek pressed against my cheek and his body is flush against mine, his skin touching me touching me touching me and he's not screaming he's not dying he's not running away from me and I'm crying
I'm choking
I'm shaking shuddering splintering into teardrops
and he's holding me the way no one has ever held me before.

Like he wants me."

-And thus Audrey melted into a feelsy puddle, never to "even" again.

But seriously, I can't deal with this. 
Can't imagine how I'm gonna get through Ignite Me (most of Unravel Me is dryer than California is right now).

So synopsis:
Juliette- "Holy shit holy shit holy shit"
Adam- tries to get her to focus while simultaneously feeling her up

Once they get out of the shower, she's still reeling and he's like "you can look at me all shirtless and wet and stuff" and she's like "...kay."
So yeah. There are a lot of cliches in this. Also, I'm pretty sure Adam has a shower fetish.

This chapter ends with him hugging her and her losing her shit because she's actually happy for once.

Don't know when I'll be posting again...but things will get a lot more frequent in the summer.
The Night Circus will be continuing also, I just wanted to come back with something I'd been waiting to do for about two months.

Also, I might be posting some non-review stuff. Writing babble, things like that.

Well, since I can't guarantee when the next post will be, toodles for now!



Monday, May 4, 2015

Shatter Me- Chapter Eighteen- Stop Making Me Hate You

So I don't feel like going over these stupid four pages in detail.

While I might be stuck over here at Camp Adam for the time being, I really, really don't want to relapsing into disliking Warner.

Instead, I'm just going to summarize.

Warner: Killing people; necessary; pervy touching; you don't realize your own power; I can help you reach your full productive potential (subtle Night Vale reference).

Juliette: Fuck you fuck you fuck you; don't touch me; murderous scum; I hate you, go to hell; I'm a monster; I'm gonna go back to my room and cry and think about Adam.

And that's pretty much it.

Next chapter: FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNALLLLLLLLYYY

Next chapter of The Night Circus will be up before next Monday.

Friday, May 1, 2015

The Night Circus- Part Two (Illumination): Chapter Twenty-Nine (The Wizard in the Tree) - Surprisingly Lacking

This chapter begins with the Murray twins being bored, as they usually are. They have no real form of education other than what they learn by experience.

This actually made me think. None of the children, save Marco, had any certifiable intellectual stimulus. So maybe Celia and Poppet (considering how much Widget reads, I'm sure he has some mathematical grasp), despite their magic ability, by the end of the book (at which point they're both over 21), would likely be unable to solve this:

log1000^2

(It's 6)

I'm gonna choose not to remember that.

Aaaaaannyway, they're sitting against a tree, drinking cider and contemplating what to do.
Poppet mentions something relating to the future and the color red, and then tells Widget they're going to have company, but that she doesn't know who it is.
(It's Bailey). She describes the red as spilled on the ground like paint.

Oh dear. I've just remembered something quite unpleasant. Must...not...spoil.

Widget tells Poppet a story that has been Kindle highlighted 1656 times. I'm not going to quote it, but the gist is: Magic and secrets and wizard tells pretty girl magic secret and girl tricks wizard and turns wizard into tree.

He magics their cider so it stays hot and she levitates her cup back to herself in a sort of passive-aggressive competition.

This chapter ends with them laughing. I wish I was bitter enough to cynic this chapter, but they're just children. Magical prophet children.

Monday, April 27, 2015

Shatter Me- Chapter Seventeen- Shots Fired

Earthlings, forgive me. I should have stopped taking my own bullshit a while ago, but I kept telling myself, and by extension, all of you, that I would be able to sort out my schedule enough to post every other day. Unfortunately, this is simply not possible. I will have to revert to twice-a-week posts. Once again, apologies.

This chapter begins with some more writing I'm actually pleased with. Juliette is outside for the first time in I-forget-how-long, and she's actually responding accordingly.

Warner asks her if it makes her happy, because underneath all that stupid he actually does care about her.
He takes out a gun, which is "not for" her, and they peer over the edge to see the soldiers gathered.

He is still being an ass, however, and introduces Juliette to Sector 45. To Juliette's joy, Jenkins is still alive. Warner makes the soldiers kneel for at least 30 seconds, which is quite a lot considering no one was speaking.

A man named Delalieu comes forward with a report. He'll be important-ish later, so remember.

"Delalieu recites: 'We have a charge against Private 45B-76423. Fletcher, Seamus.'"

Fletcher, who is, according to Juliette, incredibly ginger ("He looks like a gingerbread man") steps out of line.

This chapter ends with Warner shooting him in the head.
Lovely.

Next chapter of The Night Circus will be up before next Monday.

Monday, April 20, 2015

The Night Circus- Part Two (Illumination): Chapter Twenty-Eight (Cartomancy) - So She Can Even Predict Other People's Love Life, But Not Hers?

Good god, earthlings. I am so, so, so, so sorry. Things have been...interesting, and I've had to do some unfortunate prioritizing. I will try my best to get new posts up at a reasonable time, so at least for this week, expect posts every other day.

This chapter begins with Bailey continuing to wander the circus. This time, he finds his way to Isobel's tent, where she is waiting (by the way, I was able to gloss over two pages of him entering the tent with that one sentence).

He pays an unspecified amount, and Isobel begins the tarot reading. There are another two pages' worth of gloss-worthy writing. Then she begins her interpretation, which I'm, again, just going to quote.

"'You have a journey ahead of you," the fortune-teller says. 'There's a lot of movement. A great deal of responsibility.'"

...

"'You are part of a chain of events, though you may not see how your actions will affect the outcome at the time.'"

And then she gets more infuriating. I mean, seriously, how can she not tell Marco doesn't love her?

"'You're looking for Poppet,' she says.
"'What's a poppet?' he asks.

Ok, I'm done with this. More glossing.

She asks if he's Bailey, and when he says yes, she tells him about Poppet (to him, still the red-haired girl), and then affirms his longing.

"'You will see her again, Bailey. There's no doubt about that.'"

Before departing, he offers Isobel a chocolate. They exchange names, and this chapter ends with Bailey feeling all warm and cuddly inside.

Next chapter, God willing, will be up Wednesday.

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Shatter Me- Chapter Sixteen- Oooooooooooooooooh

So, so, so sorry about not having posted. I've been pursuing a project and it's taken up a lot of my time. Not gonna say what it is, but if you really wanted to find it, I'm fairly certain it's not totally impossible.

This chapter begins with Juliette finally being happy about something.

She's digging through the armoire, having resigned to behaving for Adam's sake, and finds something on the shelf behind the dresses Warner loves seeing her in. I'm not even gonna...just, here's the quote.

"My fingers feel their way around the surface and a surge of sunshine rushes through my stomach until I'm certain I'm bursting with hope and feeling and a force of stupid happiness so strong I'm surprised there aren't tears streaming down my face.
My notebook. 
He saved my notebook."

I'm not even gonna be cynical about this. 
And then it gets even better.

"At the very bottom there is a shift. A new sentence not written in my handwriting.
A new sentence that must've come from him.

It's not what you think."


I'm actually happy about this, and it's not even in the hopeless romantic way. Good job, Mafi.

Warner arrives and again shrugs off Juliette caring too much about Adam. He and Isobel should form a club.

With his arm around her waist, they move toward the elevator, and Juliette says something very accidentally important.

"'Your poor mother.'"

She means, of course, that she pities Warner's mother for having to raise her, but there's another very serious meaning behind those three words that we won't get to for a looong time.

Warner, acting understandably for once, is horrified and Juliette doesn't know why.
He doesn't touch her anymore.

This chapter ends with Warner doing some serious cliffhanging.

"'Welcome to your future.'"

Next chapter of Night Circus should be up before midnight on Tuesday. 

Thursday, April 9, 2015

The Night Circus- Part Two (Illumination): Second-Person Thingy (Reflections and Distortions) - Ok, This One's Just Pathetic

It's time yet again for my favorite part of this book: stupid little anecdotes that only serve to increase the page count. Okay, okay, they're not all bad, but this one certainly is. 

In this little...whatever you want to call it, you wander into a Hall of Mirrors. 

You wander around, and in one mirror, you see...wait, what?! 

"Reflected behind you there is a man in a bowler hat". 

I swear, if that's Marco again...
Though it's not exactly out of character for him.

Anyway, you walk through the trippy hall into a round room, where there are streetlamps reflected in a ring of mirrors forever. 
I get that this looks cool, but literally anyone can do this by putting two mirrors so they're facing each other.
Magical!

Well, that was disappointing. It didn't even take up a full page on my Kindle.

Shatter Me Chapter Sixteen should be up before midnight on Saturday.

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Shatter Me- Chapter Fifteen- Let's Just Add Blackmail, Shall We?

This chapter begins with Juliette having another pleasant flashback.
"Why don't you just kill yourself? someone at school asked me once."
Really warms the heart, doesn't it?

She wakes up again in Warner's bed. Better get used to it...or not, because it won't come up for a couple hundred pages.

He's finally allowing her to return to her room, after forcing her to eat some food, and as she walks out, she can see all the soldiers are truly afraid of her, hardly able to hide it. He's still being an ass, so he's all smiley and irritating, explaining that to "protect" her he had to force her to almost kill poor Jenkins.

He gets really, really close to her in the elevator before his mood turns on a dime for what won't be the last time, and he gets even closer before hissing that she's naive and threatening, etc., etc., victimizing himself by saying he's trying to help her. I do love irony, and it's pretty obvious in this scenario. 'You're so naive, girl I'm trying to get you to fall in love with me through beatings and perviness and torture of my own soldiers.' 



It's getting just as tiring to point out Warner's idiocies as it is to point out Hector being a terrible father. Uncomprehending is basically his middle name. 

He tells her to go back to her room (which she wanted to anyway) and, as a goodbye, tosses in some blackmail. Adam's been injured, and he's saying that it will continue unless she behaves.
And yes, this is blackmail. Wikipedia says that blackmail doesn't always include money, just threats unless a demand is met.

This chapter ends with Juliette silently promising to behave for Adam's sake, so Warner doesn't kill him. Well, this was a joy to read.

Spring Break is over. Unfortunately, we must return to the mundanity of the middle class, the monotony of responsibility, the lifelessness of subordination. 
This includes less frequent posts. However, I will try my best to post at least once every two days from now on. Thus said, Chapter Twenty-Eight of The Night Circus, with help of unconventional prioritization, should be up before midnight on Thursday.

Monday, April 6, 2015

The Night Circus- Part Two (Illumination): Chapter Twenty-Seven (The Magician's Umbrella) - Finally!!/More Pity for Isobel/Rejected

This chapter, this wonderful, plot-furthering chapter, begins with the circus, for once, being closed due to some truly terrible rain. Not that I'd know much about that. Stupid drought.

Celia, umbrella in hand and over head, enters a cafe, choosing to sit with Isobel. Isobel mentions planning to meet someone (Marco, who is in fact, there, poor Isobel), and they talk for awhile before Celia inquires about tarot cards and Isobel offers a reading.

I won't be able to translate the more subtle cards, because I don't have service, but fortunately Isobel is giving the reading for me.

Celia notices that one card is missing, and Isobel waves it off (the Angel, if I'm not mistaken).
After laying the cards and trying to hide her surprise, Isobel explains. I'm just going to quote it.

"'You carry a great many burdens with you. A heavy heart. Things you've lost. But you are moving toward change and discovery. There are outside influences that are propelling you forward.'
....{some non-dialogue}
'You're...not fighting, that's not really the right word for it, but there's a conflict with something unseen, something shadowed that's hidden from you.'
...{more non-dialogue}
'But it will be revealed soon,' she says.
This catches Celia's attention.
'How soon?'
'The cards do not make for the clearest of timelines, but it is very close. Almost immediate, I would think.'
...
'There's emotion,' she says. 'Deep emotion but out are only on the shore of it, still near the surface, while it is waiting to pull you under.'
...
'It's nothing that I can clearly see as good or bad, but it is...intense.'
...
'It almost contradicts itself,' she says after a moment. 'It's as if there is love and loss at the same time, together in a kind of beautiful pain.'"

Ooooh. Sorry to quote all that, but it really is important. Also, there's a chapter I'm counting down to, though not the one in less than 100 pages, a very serious chapter for Celia and Marco, and it's called "Beautiful Pain". I'd forgotten that was brought up. Again, poor Isobel.

Isobel, once she is alone, again finds the Magician card, though Marco is no longer there. Not that she knew he was.

Outside, Celia is distracted enough that it takes her a few minutes to realize that her umbrelle is keeping her completely dry, that's it's not hers.

She turns to see Marco behind her, dripping wet.
"'I believe you have my umbrella,' he says, almost out of breath but wearing a grin that has too much wolf in it to be sheepish."

That's a bit creepy...anyway, standing there, Celia realizes, just as Isobel predicted, that Marco is her opponent, and she laughs.
She then shakes the surprise off and they exchange umbrellas.
He suggests they get a drink, and she almost accepts but for the fact that she is no longer holding a magic umbrella that will keep her dry.
She's still delighted with her epiphany, taking some humor at his expense.

"'Of course you would,' Celia says, returning Marco's grin with one of her own. 'Perhaps another time.'"

She then disappears, to no surprise from Marco.
This chapter ends with him, as is becoming habit for him, staring at the space from which she vanished.

Moving now to Shatter Me Chapter Fifteen.

Finished at 1:28 pm.

Shatter Me- Chapter Fourteen- Yeah, That's Gonna Happen Again

This chapter begins with Juliette waking up in Warner's bed for the first time, but it certainly won't be the last (wink wink nudge nudge).

Of course, she's rightfully pissed, but even more confused by the weird shifts in Warner's personality, from cruel to doting. Don't worry, Juliette, so am I.

He explains that he's being nice because he cares about her. You know the saying: "They care about you, but they don't know how to show it."
Warner is the perfect example of this. He really, really, really doesn't know how to show it.

He starts talking about how they're similar because they like hurting people. He's right, actually, but not about the Juliette in this book. The Juliette in this book takes about a hundred pages to get used to someone being able to touch her, cries when she hurts someone, etc., etc., and that's why it's better, at least for now, that she has Adam instead of Warner looking out for her.

He leaves her in his room, telling her to eat and then sleep. You know, it's really hard for someone to believe you care about them when you let soldiers beat them, force them to torture people, and then lock them in your room. Just saying.

This chapter ends with her falling asleep in his bed...dammit, I already made that joke.

Moving now to The Night Circus Chapter Twenty-Seven.

Finished at 12:55 pm.

The Night Circus- Part Two (Illumination): Chapter Twenty-Six (The Ticking of the Clock) - Sorry to Hear You're Immortal. That Must Be Hard

This chapter begins with another person interrupting Mr. Barris. This time: Tara Burgess, one of the twins whose contributions to the circus are either monetary, creative, or nonexistent.

For once, someone in this book isn't in the mood to see the circus, but Tara's sister still is.
She's come by, again, not to talk about anything actually architectural, but to talk about how strange the circus is.

She mentions, in an oddly vague way, that no one who is involved in running it has been aging. There's a very good explanation for this, actually, but for now it isn't relevant.

She also mentions that she and Lainie also disagreed as to whether they should follow the circus like Thiessen and his rêveurs.
She is suspecting that things are going on in the circus that few are aware of, and she's right, of course. Mr. Barris knows what is going in, but his neutrality keeps him quiet.

She then begins to get quite dramatic, talking about not knowing if she's dreaming or awake half the time. She also mentions disliking impossibilities, which I guess means she hasn't been around Celia, Marco, Widget, Poppet, or several of the tents very much.

He suggests she consult Mr. A. H-, whom, as we've seen with his own student, probably won't be very helpful.

This chapter, this short chapter that should have just been titled "Foreshadowing", ends with Tara declining dinner and leaving.

Moving now to Shatter Me Chapter Fourteen.

Finished at 12:40

Shatter Me- Chapter Thirteen- What the Hell, Warner!?

This chapter begins with Warner continuing to be an idiot.
"'I don't want you to hate me,' Warner says as we make our way toward the elevator. 'I'm only your enemy if you want me to be.'"

Achoo.


He does say something that is both wonderfully and painfully correct, however, about Juliette changing her mind before they step into the elevator, where he gets pervy.

She asks him to tell her his first name (Spoiler Alert: It's Aaron, but he won't tell her that until a very particular moment in Unravel Me) and he responds by asking her to touch him. She refuses, however, and he gets all snappy before asking a soldier that unfortunately is not Adam to accompany her to her room, all while grabbing her arm. It makes me wonder how the soldiers have any respect for him. 

And finally, Juliette decides to do something intelligent. She runs.

They catch her, of course, but it was worth a shot.

Jenkins (the soldier) is forced to grab her arm, and here there's some very interesting premonition.

"I wish it hurt me. I wish it maimed me. I wish it repulsed me. I wish I hated the potent force wrapping itself around my skeleton. 
But I don't. My skin is pulsing with someone else's life and I don't hate it.
I hate myself for enjoying it."

Ooh. Juliette's power is pretty vaguely described in this series, and as the story progresses things get weird.

But we won't get to that for a while.

She gets free, literally kicking and screaming, and Jenkins is seriously messed up, lying on the ground, not moving, etc. 

Warner is stupidly thinking he can calm her down by touching her, which only makes her scream more. 

This chapter ends with him carrying Juliette away (by the way, he has no exposed skin) and her blacking out. Lovely.

I'm continuing now to The Night Circus Chapter Twenty-Six, but we're about to take off, so these won't be posted for a while. I guess I'll time-stamp these.

Finished 12:17 pm.

The Night Circus- Part Two( Illumination): Chapter Twenty- Five (Collaboration) - Sand? You're a Disappointment

Today is the day I return to my actual residence and real life resumes. However, as one last gift to all of you earthlings, I will be posting as much as I physically can today. However, some will not be posted until this afternoon, back-to-back, because of the debacle with planes.

This chapter begins with Marco early for his appointment with Mr. Barris. Whatever it means to make an appointment with an architect I don't know. 

Marco only wants to talk about Celia, as he usually does, and he learns from Mr. Barris that Celia doesn't know he's her opponent. Of course, Mr. Barris hadn't known either, but he promises to remain neutral. He asks if Celia was involved in something called the Stargazer (she wasn't). Before he leaves, he asks for help with something.

It's a tent designed for both Marco and Celia to manipulate. She enters it at some point, finding herself in an artificial desert at night.

Of course, Hector's still hanging unfortunately over her shoulder, and he appears to babble about collaboration and call her a disappointment. Glad to see he hasn't changed a bit. 

Meanwhile, in his flat, Marco is adding to his paper circus (which I assume manipulates the real circus), creating things for Celia to build on. Awww. How Isobel still hasn't been noticing this and/or doing anything is beyond me.

Shatter Me Chapter Thirteen and an unspecified number more posts will be up at some point today.

Shatter Me- Chapter Twelve- Warner, You're Killing Me Here

This chapter begins with Juliette finally taking a thorough shower.

She's mentally soliloquy-ing, with surprisingly few metaphors, about how she doesn't need luxury, that all she wants is to touch someone.

She does this while Adam is in the other room, dammit, and he already knows he can touch her.

Good god, Adam. There are so many more spoilers I wish I could yell (or type angrily while remaining basically expressionless) at you right now!!!

Anyway, she and Adam have a very sparse conversation about Warner wanting her to wear dresses (which is a little weird considering what he wants in their relationship) and her refusing.
He looks at her, all cleaned up, and she mistakes his surprise as possible revulsion (it's the opposite).

Warner is being awful, inexplicably awful, throughout this whole book, and it may very well be Tahreh Mafi's greatest indiscretion. Forget the metaphors, the haphazard dystopia, the grammar. Warner goes through a complete and basically unexplained 180° between now and the end of Unravel Me, and it is not okay. Sure, Juliette's perception changes, but he goes from the pervy and warped antagonist to romantic and justified and amazing. He doesn't have some earth-shattering epiphany or anything of the sort. It's like he's two different people: the sadist and the hopeless romantic, and in the first book he's basically portrayed as his father (who's just as bad as Hector, by the way) and then spends the rest of the series hating his father. It's ridiculous.

Moving along, he's expecting her to be all happy about being forced to eat with him, being all calm and calling her "love" (kinda reminds me of the creepy mom in Coraline) and she responds with something that she'll end up saying the opposite of.

"'I'd really rather die than eat your food and listen to you call me love,' I tell him."

Well, Juliette, he calls you that at least five times in the course of twenty-four hours in Ignite Me, and it serves both of you pretty well...

Jeez, this is getting spoiler-heavy. Next I'll be talking all about how Adam and Warner have-
Neeeever mind.

For whatever reason, Warner responds to this by shooting some meat. Oh no, so scary. Every soldier in this building, including Adam, could have done that.
Adam pushes some food in front of her, silently begging her to eat it. Warner sees this, and jokes about it. Kind of ironic, considering how he goes ballistic when he figures out that- Okay, I need to stop. No more spoilers.

This chapter ends with Warner telling her to eat, because she needs to look good when she's "standing beside" him. Really? She said she'd rather die that eat some damn good food after being in an asylum where you're fed mush once a day because it was involved with you in some way. Your expectations are stupidly high.

Next chapters of both this and The Night Circus will be up later today.